I originally posted this on What-if Modellers (a more "British" site), just putting this here for Alvis's idea ....
EDITED sidewaaaays ....
June 2nd 1974,
Russia begins its new push against the West, starting with the isolation of Berlin thus initiating the 2nd Berlin Airlift & once again employing all cargo aircraft that are available. Soviet troops slowly advance 50kms eastwards from the border and are temporarily held there by a mix of Bundeswere, British & US forces .....
The NATO "rapid troop reinforcement" plan is instituted but due to massive British Army cut-backs they no longer have sufficient vehicles to do the job, planning to rely on aircraft to move troops. Unfortunately a major fault has grounded the entire RAF fleet of these aircraft and due to Health & Safety requirements neither foreign-registered, civil or airline aircraft can now be used to move HM troops -- even an invasion of Western Europe couldn't sway the public-servants from suspending the rules, so another way had to be found.
London Transport was in the middle of another strike & its busses stand idle in their sheds. After an all-night sitting in Parliament, special legislation is passed to commandeer the bus fleet & use it to move our Brave Boys to the Front. The Dover Ports quickly hear of this & the car-ferry crews rub their hands with glee at the fat pay-packets to be extorted from the Government for ferrying these vehicles across the Channel.
On hearing of the new war-crisis, the bus-driver's union gets all patriotic and, temporarily, recinds the strike -- it was imagined that they would either be conscripted for the duration anyway or replaced by those "untrained (non-union) Army drivers" ... and they couldn't have that.
The Sovs were a bit slow to get their air-force into action -- after years of restricted flying hours (9am to 8pm) on East German bombing ranges due to noise, the crews had got used to sleeping in & a lazy start to work. However they finally got up in the air & started dropping frag-bombs on & behind the NATO front-lines. En-route to Germany the RouteMasters (in the hands of their regular drivers & RAF cargo-masters supervising stowage of kit-bags etc) had a quick drab paint-job & shutters added to the windows in an effort to stop the expected frag-splinters - these shutters were a composite of rubber, thin steel & plywood sandwich giving the Routemasters much the same appearance as the old London B-type busses used in WW1.
As in every war, a few songs became synonymous with that war .... for this "1st West War", while travelling across France, the song was "We're all going on a Summer Holiday", after the popular '60's movie. On arrival several of the busses were apparently in good condition outside but a total shambles inside - seats torn, walls smashed even the non-slip flooring was ripped up in places. It was eventually found that these vehicles had been used to transport the 5th Butlins Division and they had taken the "summer holiday" theme to heart and coupled it with the usual behaviour of UK football fans. Now unfit for their intended use without a full rebuild, they remained at the Front & were assigned as "command" busses. Hastily outfitted with map-tables, white-boards, desks & radio equipment on the top deck -- one even had a small "tower" added for use as an impromptu RAF landing-director vehicle for a Harrier squadron operating off the autobahn.
After their behaviour became public in newspapers in England, the 5th Butlins were to be disgraced & sent home under court-marshall for damaging these vehicles, however they distinguished themselves in action the next day against crack Soviet troops attacking their position -- chasing the Sovs back over 2 kms with cries of "Hidey Hi !, Hidey Ho ! We're going to give you a right thrashing, so off you go !". Instead of disgrace, they returned to their Bognor Regis barracks as heros.
Home-base of the 5th Butlins regiment ...
