Oberleutnant Lt. Ignaz Bernhard Niemand (Ibby to his friends) of the RLM Special Projects Division doodled idly on the scratch pad located centrally on his messy desk. He was thinking of his long overdue vacation in the Alps when he heard footsteps in the hall. One set of boots? No two. No three sets. This is not good he thought to himself.
One visitor means a quick chat on a current project. Two visitors means we need your opinion Three visitors means you are big trouble at the RLM.
A sharp knock was heard. He was never given an opportunity to acknowledge the knock which was immediately followed by an opening door. In walked his boss, Major Seiber, his superior offizer, a Hauptmann with pilot’s wings and an Oberst he has never seen before.
Oh oh thought Ibby, Ich bin in der scheiße. They stopped, looked around his office which was strew with engineering diagrams 20cm thick on every flat surface, you could not tell what colour his walls were as every square metre was covered with some type of drawing. Wind tunnel models hung from the ceiling.
A snort of disgust was issued by the Oberst. The Hauptmann smiled. Major Seiber stared at his boots.
Major Seiber cleared his throat and broke the awkward silence. Ibby, we have a problem and need your help. This caught Ibby completely off guard. A blank look of astonishment on his face was approval to proceed.
The Oberst spoke for the first time. Oberleuntant Niemand, the STZ division has developed a new radar and air-to-air missile which we believe will change airwar forever. We need to test this new combination in an aircraft which can carry both radar and the missiles.
I never heard of the STZ division. I need to go to the offizer's club more often and get a few friends drunk on Peach Schnaps.
Okay thought Ibby. Oberst, has not the JU-88 which has been modified to carry the FuG240 “Berlin” be the preferred aircraft.
For the FuG240, yes but this new radar is 90 CM in diameter. As well the missiles are of a unique design. And we do not want this technology to fall into the hands of allies so we feed a fast and reliable aircraft. The JU-88 is too slow and not big enough for our needs.
90 CM!!!! Der liebe Gott! That is huge. Oberst, we do not have a airborne radar which has a dish that large. And what about the missiles? What do they look like? What is different about this combination? I thought all our air to air missiles were wire guided? Niemand was greeted with silence.
Oberleuntant, how it works it is no concern of yours. All we need from you is a flying platform which can hold the new radar, two of the new missiles and be able to out-run any allied aircraft it may encounter.
The Oberst looked at the Hauptmann who spoke for the first time. Oberleuntant, I am a test pilot assigned to the RLM and will be flying the new aircraft. I have flown most Luftwaffe aircraft including the JU-88, Me 210/410, Do 335, Me 1101 and Me 1111. I am sure I can fly whatever you design.
Quatsch! There goes my vacation plans.
To be continued ......
From the diseased mind of Carl, here is Ibby's design. Please excuse the excess of tape. I'm still trial fitting the pieces.
Any guesses on the donor kits? I have not added all the final components.
